The annual December issue typically has three of everything: three covers, three times as many calories, $3 million worth of craft projects, three hundred ways to feel inferior and clumsy, etc. This year, however, on the issue’s 20th anniversary, she throws in a piece on being healthy (?!), which typically belongs to the infamously devoid-of-color January issue, and includes a Gift Guide, which blows to smithereens my plan of hand-making everyone’s gifts this year.
Thank god she didn’t skimp on the Triple Cover, and double TG that I got the one featuring her wearing a sequined blazer or whatever that is.
On page 124, she rolls out a recipe for cookie dough that makes 30 different cookies, which I think everyone’s been doing all along anyway, but the captions are really not to be missed.
I’m not even going to address the Collecting article (“Vintage Elves: Really, What’s Not to Love?” How about that they’re creepy, for starters), which is typically one of my favorites, and head right to the section where she bedazzles shoes and rings and throw pillows with sequins!
- 20 Years of Good Things – 2002: Make a wreath out of your Christmas cards!
- Barks & Brittles – no explanation needed here
- Hanukkah crafts – DREIDEL PLACE CARDS!
- And lots and lots of ways to use Christmas lights
After all this excess, she hits you on page 203 with “10 Feel-Good Things to Do This December,” which isn’t quite the full body/mind/home onslaught that we can expect in January, but it still reminds us that we are not getting any younger and sequins do not look good on sallow, pudgy people.
But, boring old January can wait. Right now, it’s go time.